Our doubts are traitors

Our doubts are traitors - Shakespeare

How many times you have thought of doing something different, something out of ordinary and your fear has stopped you from doing it? Its too risky, its too fantastic or its ridiculous.  Familiar with the feeling? Our doubts are our traitors.

They stop us from putting trust in a relationship, they stop us from making a career change, they stop us from walking out from a bad relationship, and they stop us from following our dream.

So one should not listen to our inner feeling or don't pay heed to those doubts? Enter in to relationship and get betrayed? Leave our job and loose everything? Wait for the other person to change and be content with what we have?

There is a difference between doubt and an informed decision. If you see red flags right in the begin ing of a relationship, i.e., late coming, not returning calls or messages etc., do stop and think if it is a relationship worth getting into. Do your homework about your dream project before leaving your job. Do think of legal, emotional and financial aspects before you walk out of an abusive relationship. But that will be paying due diligence and not doubting. 

You can take up your hobby on a part time basis and you can have a frank talk about things that upset you in a relationship or you can make a solid base before you leave your job. But don't ever doubt if you can do it or not. If you can think of it, you can do it. Napoleon Hill said, ‘whatever the human mind can conceive, it can achieve'.

So smile, tell your doubts to go out and let hope, joy and confidence come in to take you to a journey of fulfillment.

So be it!!!

Life is a shuttle

I don't know what The Bard had in his mind when he wrote this but life, certainly, is a shuttle. Or not? A shuttle goes to and fro and keeps moving in a loop but life I think, is a journey which goes on and on. It does have its hiccups and stalls us sometime but even then life keeps passing.

Now whether the journey is pleasant or miserable is, to a large extent, in our hands. I hear the naysayers,'its fate, destiny, kismet' and so on. I agree it is not always possible to get the results we want even after we have put in our best effort and have focused on our goal. We do get disappointed with our failures. We get depressed, we fret and fume, take out our frustrations on our near and dear ones. We even think the universe is conspiring against us and the world is out to get us.

No, I am not going to say, don't feel this way or be positive. It is very natural to feel this way. Enjoy your share of misery. Wallow in self pity for  some time. Done? Do you feel any better? No? See the futility of all that anger and persecution complex? Its not going g to lead you anywhere but to the abysmal pit of impotent anger and self destruction.

So what to do? Just take a diary and write down the reasons you can think of your failures. It does not matter if the failure is in business or relationships. The causes are essentially the same. We either don't give proper attention to areas we need to or ignore the core issues. So write honestly and not with self righteousness. Where do you think you could have handled things differently? What strategy you could have applied to avoid this mishap?

If you are really honest, you will not only get your answers but an insight too of how to turn things around d. It recently happened with me. I went through  a period of frustration in a relationship. I fortitude, I was so full of self righteousness that I allowed it to cloud my judgement. But, I had the epiphany and I decided to a new strategy to handle things. No, in a relationship, you don't have to be harsh but you can be firm and polite while stating your position.

The prerequisite is intellectual honesty. Be absolutely realistic and don't let anger dictate your mind.

Go ahead and do it, you will feel the difference.

So be it !!!!