The perfect ones are always flawed

Just saw an interview with Cameron Diaz. She said something very interesting. She said when people meet her; they say I want to be like you. I want to be in movies, to be famous. And she said, ‘I ask them why? ‘Because I want to be famous, to be rich.’

And she said if you want to be in movies because you want to be famous, you would never be happy. She said when she is with her family; she is just a girl and not The Cameron Diaz.

Being famous or rich is no guarantee to be happy. People who have all the money or are famous are not necessarily happy. If that were so, Whitney Houston, Prince and so many others would not have taken their lives. In fact, seemingly perfect life is always flawed.

Do we have any idea how lonely that rich socialite is? That is why she is at every party because there is nobody at home to sit with her. Do we have any idea how frustrated that tycoon is because his children are into drugs? And leave these big issues. You think they don’t have other mundane problems?

We hanker after what we don’t have and forget to count our blessings. We don’t appreciate the time we can spend with our family than going to a party every day where people just have a plastic smile on their faces and talk of inane things.

I don’t mean to say that success brings problems but just that perfection is impossible. Nobody ahs a perfect life but we can make it so by our attitude.

So think about it…

So be it!!!

The only journey is the one within

I read that yesterday and I agree with it. The journey within answers so many questions, can take us on a discovery trail. We uncover so many things about ourselves, which we never knew.

But, it can be scary too. In fact it is often more scary than we envisage because the truths we discover about ourselves. Humans have a tendency to push back unpleasant things. We store them away in our subconscious mind. Things like jealousy, anger, greed, and envy. We want to present our best and most humane side to the world, even ourselves.

We delude ourselves in thinking we are a paragon of virtues and how others are still embroiled in petty things. Oh! What a relief we get!!! But these thoughts don’t go away. They are there lying dormant in the back allies of our mind and when we start the journey within, they re-emerge like the proverbial dragon. And we run away, we get scared. We stop the journey. We don't want to face the ugly truths about ourselves. But this is the crucial point. Face them and you will cleanse yourself forever of all negativity. Slowly, the dragons will disappear and the rainbow of pure bliss will emerge.

Have patience and will power. Start the journey today

So be it!!!

Delays have dangerous ends

How true. It’s so uncanny how Shakespeare writes life’s truths. Well as we know, it is the earthy wisdom that comes in handy when all your academic knowledge fails. Delays do cause us losses. Whether it is procrastination, avoidance of a conflicting situation or simply being lazy, delays can make you miss that golden chance of your life. A dream job can go to someone else, a project can fail to take relationships can go sour because you are always late.

It nearly happened in to one of my friends. When she started dating her now husband, he was always late. She would be standing on a bus stop or waiting in a restaurant alone. Imagine the stares and remarks she had to go through in India in 80’s. Then one day, she gave her boyfriend an ultimatum. She told him if he was not in time, she was going to break up with him.  That woke him up.

Today they have been married for 32 years but imagine if he had not mend his ways. They would have lost each other.  I am particularly talking about relationships because everyone thinks delays can cost career losses. But what about the most important things in our life? Our relationships? Even if you are successful in your career but have no family or friends, are you successful?

Why should our life weave around our jobs, career goals, sales target only? Why maintaining relationships not be our target? Think…

So be it!!!

Our doubts are traitors

Shakespeare again. Have you ever faced a situation where you wanted to take a bold step and somebody stopped you by saying, ‘that is not possible.’ I bet you felt frustrated. You felt righteous anger. And why not? Here you are taking a risk in your life and your parents, spouse, friends or family is stopping you.

But what about the situation where you wanted to take a bold step and stopped because you doubted your self. I can’t do it, or it is beyond me or what if I fail? It could be a bold decision of taking up commerce or humanities in your high school and choosing science instead because you were not sure if you could do well in physics and maths. Or it could be proposing to the girl you admired thinking what if she rejects me. It could also want to leave a well-paid MNC job in search of your writing passion.

You doubted yourself!!! I know you have very logical arguments against what I am saying and some them may be very valid. You had family responsibilities and the risk was not worth it. Chances of becoming successful in your dream project were very slim and so on. Or it was not to be.

But think of what could have happened if you had taken that step? Chetan Bhagat would have been still working for a multinational if he had not taken the risk of pursuing his writing.

So see all the pros and cons and take a calculated risk. How? That part tomorrow.

Till then, happy dreaming.

 So be it!!!

Step into my world

I talked about cultural appropriation yesterday. There is a big hue and cry about the issue these days. Now tell me Tom Altar, an actor who is an American but was raised in India feels more at home in India than anywhere else, is a desi or not? If he talks about a cultural issue which he has observed for long, is that cultural appropriation?

Some people say that when you portray a particular people in a derogatory light, then it is cultural appropriation. So then stop teaching Shakespeare because he calls Jews by all sorts of demeaning terms. He was a by-product of his time. His Hamlet is taken from Hungary so will you stop regarding him as master playwright?

We have no tolerance for any diverse opinion or thought these days. On one hand we, the educated ones, try to show ourselves as tolerant of other cultures and on the other hand, we get into frenzy if somebody talks about a particular community.

Give me a break. Is any culture that fragile that it will suffer a major meltdown if somebody wrote about it without being born in it? Is any society that vulnerable that it will lose its identity if somebody makes a joke about a particular ritual prevalent in it?

Lets have some humour back in our lives. Lets make fun of ourselves.

So be it!!!

No legacy is rich as honesty

So said The Bard. I am back with another quote from Shakespeare. He never ceases to amaze me. His quotes are full of earthy wisdom and I wonder why people in this part of the world don’t adapt his quotes in their life. They will be more peaceful.

But then, our lives are now full of stresses that we invite unnecessarily, we are bombarded with news that makes no sense, we have politicians speaking banalities and icons who are a role models but have no direction in life themselves.

We all try to be politically correct lest we offend someone’s feelings, don’t express our views openly lest we are seen as bigoted and don’t participate in issues that may affect our immediate future lest we are taken as a closed minded person.

But where is our intellectual honesty? Is hiding your true emotions honesty? Is political correctness in public and ranting privately honesty? Is expressing your views openly a crime? Why are we so scared now?

We don’t even joke about a particular section or race or community for fear of being labelled as racist. Where is our sense of humour?

And now we have this issue of cultural appropriation. A big storm in a teacup. More about that tomorrow. But for today, just try to be honest for a day. You don’t have to be overly offensive but at least try to express your opinion openly for today.

So be it!!!