‘We do not judge the people we love’ – Sartre

How can we? If we are, we don’t love them. Does that mean we don’t see their fault? We can see their faults, their weaknesses and their frailties but we accept them as they are. We don’t put conditions that first you become what I want and then Ill love you. That is not the language of love.

That is the language of control, manipulation and insecurity. Imagine being in a relationship where you are constantly questioned, criticized and ridiculed, all in the name of love. Na!!! That is not love. When we truly love someone, we do not judge them for their looks, mannerisms and beliefs. We love them for who they are as a person and not how much are they earning or how sophisticated they are.

Yes, looks do matter in the initial stages of a relationship but looks alone cannot sustain a relationship. That is sustained by mutual trust and respect for each other. All happily married couples have that in common. They love each other without judging, care for each other without any expectations and cherish each other because that makes them happy. There are no conditions there.

Judging is the first step of the end. Be it a friendship, a romantic relationship or a parent child relationship, one has to open and understanding. Try to feel empathy, where they are coming from. To judge is to kill the fine elements.

If I am sounding a little preachy today, then I just want to say that there are times when one has to sit and take a look at the relationships in your life. Take sometime and ponder. Are you judgemental?

Try to think with empathy.

So be it